Motherhood & Friendship.

After I got married, I was of course blissful and so grateful to have found an amazing husband to share my life with. After the honeymoon wore off; however I noticed something lacking...friendship, or at least the regular connections with friends. I've maintained some GREAT friendships and even gained some excellent new ones, but as I've entered into motherhood I've found the outings with friends are few and far between. Things have to be so planned out, so arranged...I miss the days of high school when your best friends just went everywhere with you...to the bathroom, to the mall, to bed, to school, whatever, wherever, whenever! It didn't matter, and it was like there was no shortage of female comraderie. I blame social media for a lot of this change, but I think much of it has to do with America and our preconceived notions that we have to have everything clean before someone comes over, everything checked off our to-do list, and have make up on with a smile to match. I often wonder if it were not for Facebook, how many of us would make the effort to talk to our friends, see their babies, and enjoy quality time? This makes me sad, and I know that I am to blame as well. My days are filled with work, taking care of my family, church, taking care of Calvin, and trying to get some sleep in there somewhere if possible. There is little time for leisure for myself, let alone going out with girlfriends. But like I said before, why do things have to be so specifically planned? I'm going to make a concerted effort to change this in my life. I read a blog post yesterday that literally brought tears to my eyes. It referenced what one Mom experienced during her time in Kenya when she noticed that none of the women ever felt lonely:

"They spend their days singing and dancing together, washing clothes together, watching their children together, standing in line for water together. They live in tight-knit communities that never allow each other to fall down. If a woman can’t feed her children, then the woman next door puts food for everyone on the table. They never face a Friday night on Facebook, looking up old boyfriends and reading about parties that they weren’t invited to. They always have a friend right by their side"


So here's to the sleepovers where you laughed so hard someone peed their pants, the nights you stayed up as late as possible just to say you did, and the times you cried together and it felt like you were literally holding each other up. I'm on my way to get some of that back, and STILL be a great wife and Mommy.