Season Survival

This blog is dedicated to the Moms of babies and children everywhere who are frantically wrapping, baking, cleaning, and, well, doing anything but sleeping in anticipation of Santa...err.. Jesus' arrival this weekend! Here are a few things that help me get through the holidays with an energetic, busy, loud, and happy toddler!



A large canvas tote and moccasins. It is SO much easier to carry one bag instead of a purse AND a diaper bag when you are traveling, shopping, and spending time at other people's homes for the holidays! Some of the contents of this bag include diapers, wipes ( I use a Ziploc bag ),  lipgloss, a small clutch for easy access to debit cards or keys (so I don't have to take the whole bag into the store or restaurant every time), small toys for Calvin, Sippy Cup with water, snacks such as Cheerios and Cheddar Bunnies. This bag could seriously save a life. ;) Oh and the moccasins..yea they're pretty great as slippers or for running errands!




Ahh, the Sippy. I don't give Calvin juice very much (sugar high, no thank you) so I try to have one Sippy in the car, and one at home. It gives Calvin something to do in the car, and this cup in particular is great! It's spillproof and BPA free. The soft tip is easy for Calvin to drink out of. The brand is Munchkin.




Organization is key to maintaining my sanity! I love this little coat hook for Calvin's hoodies. It's secondhand, and I'm sure you could find one at Goodwill or Walmart. I prefer to layer Calvin because he sweats inside stores, and it's so much easier to remove layers to make him more comfortable!




Moms need love, too! I love Mary Kay Timewise foundation. I use the Matte option, and I don't leave the house without it on. Let's be honest, no one gets much accomplished when they feel frazzled. Take the extra 10 minutes to smooth your hair and slap on some makeup. You'll feel better, and so will everyone around you. ;)


 


We have had quite the struggle beating a nasty fungal rash that Calvin developed a few months ago. We tried EVERY cream imaginable, went through 2 prescription creams (totaling up to 100 dollars, thankyouverymuch) tried every homeopathic remedy I could find (Lavender oil did help somewhat), and FINALLY I found Triple Paste. This stuff is golden. This size tub costs 17.99 but believe me when I say all you need is a fingertip. (And if you've met my child, you know his bottom is not small) They also sell smaller sizes; I've seen the smaller tubes at Walmart. Trust me when I say this saved my baby's bottom! I will never use another cream.



Happy Toddler, Happy Mommy!





One final tip for surviving the holidays with babies and kids. ENJOY IT. Before you know it, your nephew will be 13 like mine is and you will miss the days when an Elmo toy did the job. Calvin is already changing in little ways each day, and I cannot wait to see the joy on his face on Christmas morning! Cherish these moments and truly remember the reason we celebrate. I know I am.

Holidaze.

Well, the holiday season is upon us!  I absolutely love Christmas time!  It truly is the celebration of our Saviour's birth with the added benefit of quality time with loved ones. It is so easy to get caught up in the crazy whirlwind of holiday shopping, baking, decorating, not to mention still going about a regular routine. Although I love this time of year, I do feel the stress and always wish I had more time! Calvin has been such a joy this season so far. He is noticing all the decorations, lights and loves our tree.  He stands in front of it and says "pretty, pretty!"  He is almost 14 months old and growing so fast. It seems like he does something new each day! His birthday party was a blast, and we've been busy bees ever since. I often miss my friends lately and wish I could just stop everything (work, kids, bills, chores) for a girls night filled with laughs. I'm grateful for real friends who understand the responsibilities I have and are there for me no matter what. Just a phone call or text is so needed sometimes.
Our family had a great Thanksgiving, but poor Calvin had a cough and cold so he was pretty miserable. I baked pumpkin cupcakes with cream cheese frosting, and the day after Thanksgiving I cooked a whole feast for my in laws and Elio's grandparents. I love cooking and baking...my Dad is an excellent cook and I've learned from watching him and reading recipes. I love providing people I care about with food...it's one of ways I show my love. It's also very therapeutic for me. Life is hectic but I love the peace of mind cooking brings...unless your meat thermometer breaks and you are holding your breath hoping the turkey isn't raw.  (It wasn't, by the way)
So although I haven't blogged in a while, please know its not due to lack of the desire to. I've been feeling stretched pretty thin lately and have found myself crashing into bed wondering when the room will stop spinning. And no, that's not due to any kind of beverage ;) Life is crazy busy for me, it always has been but much more so lately. I'm trying to get better about letting go and follow my motto "Do what you can, with what you have" Our family dynamic now has a sometimes-living-us 13 year old. So a 13 month old, a 13 year old, a few pets (I've lost count), full time high stress career, and a husband whose work schedule changes seemingly every other week. But God is ALWAYS good. I'll have my time someday. Maybe a few girlfriends or a good book will be there, and I'll close my eyes and miss this. So for now, I am going to go back to my list and check it twice. Then I'm going to soak up some much needed family time!


Some updates on our toddler:
-He's walking!! He's doing so well and walks all over the house. This comes with bumps and bruises, but so far so good!
-He is learning new words and has his own "language" it's so adorable and hilarious.
-He responds to verbal commands like "turn off the light", or "put that lid on", "pick up your toys", "brush your hair", etc. Today he even took some tissues off the ground and threw them in the trash!
-He claps...the right way!
-Sings and dances
-Enjoys bigger boy toys like blocks, trains, and cars
-"Reads" books by turning the pages and looking at the pictures
-Is eating much better. But don't ask what his favorite food is...This"all natural"  Mom is embarrassed by my son's love of french fries! Oh well, I'll pick my battles on that one.
-He's still nursing. I'm leaning towards the self weaning route, and he's still getting his primary nutrition from breast milk. I am grateful for this blog where I can share the facts behind my decision...even though I don't have to. So get ready for a possible blog on this subject. ;)
-Calvin sleeps really well...with us. Another one that I know will change with time. If not, that's ok too. Our bed may be small, but our hearts are big!


Peace & love this Christmas. Remember that there is always someone fighting a harder battle than yours.

Fall Update

I cannot believe the holidays are right around the corner! As much as I adore fall with all its loveliness, I absolutely love Christmas. I could do without the hustle and bustle of shopping for presents, but the meaning, feel, and happiness that Christmas brings is more than enough for me. I'm making myself wait until after Thanksgiving to decorate...

For now, here's an update on what our ONE year old is up to!
-Calvin is almost walking independently. We've found that our boy is quite cautious and does not want to fall. He took a couple steps on his own the day before his birthday, and now we are waiting for him to take off!
-He is dancing! It is beyond cute. It's hilarious to watch my little guy shake his hips to music.
-He talks to us all day! It's not always understandable, but he makes his wants and needs very known. His favorite thing to do now is point to different objects and say "Dee, dee!" (See, See!!)
-Calvin is a little stinker. He is very mischevious, and knows exactly what he isn't supposed to do...then he does it.
-As for eating, WELL, that's an adventure. Calvin is very independent...and picky. He gave up on purees a long time ago and refuses to be fed from a spoon. Of course you live and learn, and I shoud have taken his cues that he was ready to eat on his own. He has been able to feed himself for a couple of months now, and loves Cheerios and crackers. As for more substantial foods, we're getting there. Turns out he loves my Dad's recipe for egg cassarole...so I will be making that every week. ;) I appreciate good friends' advice, and I've given him all kinds of goodies to try. Grapes, apples, chicken, and basically whatever we are eating. I let him try everything as long as it's safe for him to have it. I know that in time he will fall into a routine and eat like a champ. Even though he's a picky little guy, he will try everything that I give him which makes me very happy. He can drink out of cups, and use a straw which is so cute.

That's all for now. I'm sure there will be much, much more to come.

Going Green...Sort of.

I never used to be environmentally conscious or even live anything close to resembling an organic lifestyle. In college, I'm pretty sure McDonald's double cheeseburgers were a daily occurance...not to mention several Coke's a day. Over the past few years I've made some changes I am very proud of, and I now know the importance of choosing good foods, better cleaning products, and homeopathic remedies. Don't get me wrong, I still eat fast food! (oh, and I ate about 4 Chips Ahoy a few minutes ago) It's about small changes leading to an overall lifestyle change, and I believe that you can enjoy pretty much everything in moderation. It started with my nephews who all have some sort of emotional or behavioral issue that requires us to watch what we feed them. I noticed that sugared, processed foods made them act literally insane. Also, dairy products in excess seem to trigger major allergies for one of them. I began becoming really ingredient conscious, and it's more important to me now than ever to eat foods that are not only good for you, but real. While pregnant, I also began thinking quite a bit about cleaning products, and the chemicals they would leave on surfaces and floors. Here are some of the changes I've made progressively over the past few months and years:
-I used to be hooked on Pine Sol, but I now use Mrs. Meyers Clean Day All Purpose Cleaner. It comes in great scents, but has less harmful chemicals and is environmentally friendly. It also lasts twice as long, and you can dilute it and clean pretty much anything.
-Method hand soap, laundry detergent, fabric softener, and dish detergent. The Method brand is affordable, works great, and the laundry detergent lasts forever. You only need 4 pumps for a large load of laundry, it smells good, and does the job. It's made of plant based materials and won't affect sensitive skin. Method is sold at Target, and you will often get register coupons.
-Seventh Generation bathroom cleaner. It's bleach free, and is actually cheaper than major brands like Scrubbing Bubbles. Think about it...I'm cleaning the surfaces and toys that Calvin has his mouth all over, why would I want him to be basically eating harmful elements?
-Bon Ami powdered cleaner for hard surfaces (like tub bottoms, sinks, stovetop,etc) I used to use only Comet cleaner, but Bon Ami works just as great. My Dad used it for years for everything including pots and pans.
-I'm a big Clorox Wipe fan because it's easy and convenient, but I know it's not the best option, not to mention wasteful. This is one thing I haven't changed...yet.
-I'm still a fan of Burts Bees lotion for Calvin. I also like Aveeno products. We use disposable diapers, but I'm curious to learn more about cloth. If I didn't work full time, cloth may be an option. Or if I could hire someone to do my laundry... hmm... any takers?
-When buying pacifiers, sippy cups, or any other plastic made products, I always make sure they're BPA free. BPA has been linked to cancer, and it is in many plastic products.
-Food: Here's where it gets tough. We all know how expensive organic food is, so I just try to buy selectively. If chicken is on sale, I'll get regular chicken depending on the brand. Wal-Mart has a great organic option for chicken that isn't too pricey. Town and Country now has organic meats. They are expensive, so I sort of pick and choose which ones I buy. My theory is "Do what you Can". I try to stay away from processed cheeses and prefer to buy real. I'd rather something be real, even if it's not necessarily organic. Target has great brands as well. I love Annie's products for kids. Cheddar bunnies and their mac and cheese are great inexpensive options that are made with organic, real products! It's also important to buy organic dairy if at all possible. I still eat fast food, I know, I know...it's disgusting. My job requires me to constantly be on the go, and hey, I love a good french fry! If I eat "garbage" for lunch, I try to balance it out with a good home cooked meal for dinner...or go to my parents house for my Dad's home cooking. ;) As for produce, I try to go by the "dirty dozen" which lists the 12 fruits and veggies that are the most important to buy organic.


Like I said before, my theory is "Do What You Can". Even a little change is a good change!

ONE

Well, the biggest milestone of them all has arrived and I must say I am pretty proud of myself! I have made it to Calvin's first birthday with minimal tears and maybe only one anxiety attack over the past week. It's so wild how quickly it went, and how many moments are frozen in my memory forever. This day a year ago, I was marveling at  my newborn baby boy and today I played with a happy, healthy, silly one year old who is able to look right at me and call me Mama. This day is more than my son's birthday, it is the anniversary of me becoming a Mother. I always knew I wanted to be a Mom, but I never grasped how truly life altering it would be. The moment I became pregnant, my world changed. It was no longer about me, my wants, my needs. Everything I ate, listened to, and looked at grew newfound perspective. My relationship with God also grew and stregnthened because I now had a better idea of how God sees us, His children. That unconditional, never failing, no-matter-how-many-times-you-mess-up LOVE. It's truly the most powerful thing. Parenthood comes with its fair share of challenges, and the last year has by no means been easy. It puts new laugh lines on your face, but also deeper wrinkles under your eyes from sleep deprivation. It brings your relationship with your husband to an amazing new level, but also brings new ground for arguments and testing times. It quickly weeds out friends who are all about late nights or show no interest in your "new" life. I feel like the last year has taught me more than any college course ever did, and I have truly found what God wants me to be. Elio's Wife, Calvin's Mom. Although there are so many more facets to who I am, those are the cornerstone to my overall purpose in life. Serve God, take care of my family, be a good friend, and throw my career in there somewhere. You could even take my career out, for all I care at this point. I cannot wait to see what the future holds, even though there were so many times over the past year that I said with tears in my eyes "Can't we just freeze him like this forever?"
Calvin is such a sweetheart and brings joy to everyone who meets him. I know God has big plans for him, and I'm content to just sit back, watch, and be his Mommy. Happy Birthday, Calvin Robert!

A look back...

Grateful

I have to take a moment to just thank God that this picture is even possible. So many people have been praying for my family and loving us, and my heart is full when I see my son with my Dad.


I've had a rough week. Work stress, financial worry, and the "working mom" grind had me down. Not to mention the fact that I still have a husband who works just as hard and moments alone are few and far between.
The reality is that I am SO blessed. I have a home, a man who loves me, a healthy, happy baby, and my family is doing well. Some days are better that others, but isn't that just life? It is so easy to become weary with the menial tasks of each day and the stress of staying afloat in this oh-so-lovely economy. Not to mention the constant juggling act of work, baby, and the boys...which makes me feel like a deficient circus performer. Trying to find some peace and quiet in the middle of it all is nearly impossible.


This moment happened over the weekend, and as I snapped the photo I couldn't help but think about how none of the "stuff" matters. The bills, work, laundry, dishes. The things I don't have, the things that don't get done or I can't afford to do. None of it matters. People matter, love matters, and most importantly a relationship with a Father who hears our prayers and provides endlessly to meet our needs-that is what matters. 




“The willingness to be and to have just what God wants us to be and have, nothing more, nothing less, and nothing else, would set our hearts at rest, and we would discover the simpler life,
the greater peace.”
~Elisabeth Eliot

Almost One?

I absolutely cannot believe that October is upon us. It literally feels like a few minutes ago that I was getting his room ready and packing a bag for the hospital. Here is an update on what our little...err..big pumpkin is up to:
-If you say "Puppy Dog", he sticks his tongue out and starts panting. One of my personal favorites! haha!
-He is constantly saying "Dada, Daddy, DAD" Calvin loves his Dad and is very vocal about it! He wants only Mama at bedtime though.
-Calvin has decided he is moving past pureed baby foods and is ready for more substantial food. I realized this when he went on "strike" from eating purees, but reached for a Goldfish cracker and proceeded to eat it like it was nothing. He has 7 teeth so I guess we're ready for "real" foods! He of course eats like a champ for the babysitter, but at home we're focusing more on whatever we're eating, just in Calvin sized portions. Most of it ends up on the floor, but oh well!
-Calvin can stand independently but still gets nervous to do it on his own. He is so close to walking, and I have a feeling that he will be doing so by his first birthday.
-He loves any game... hide and seek is hilarious to him, he loves to be chased (especially if he has something he isn't supposed to have), and he LOVES to laugh! Just last week Elio was playing a game with his blocks where Elio acted like he was hurt when Calvin would throw the blocks at him. (They're soft blocks) Calvin was laughing hysterically and actually fell over from laughing so hard!
-Calvin is a pro at giving kisses, and is so sweet.
-He has become so perceptive. My Mom watched him for us while we went out to dinner for our anniversary, and he started waving Bye Bye to her when she arrived to pick him up! haha! He knows when something is up.
-Calvin loves the boys. He plays so well with them, and they are so sweet with him! I'm blessed to have my firstborn surrounded by other boys he can learn from and interact with.
-If you catch him doing something wrong, he immediately starts "clapping" his hands! I guess it's to show you he's too cute to be in trouble. :)


Here are some of my go-to products, and favorite items for our growing boy:
-I only use Burt's Bees baby lotion on him! It's hands down the best.
-Pampers Cruisers diapers. They hold everything in- even the messiest diapers. The big boxes usually have coupons in them, and if you shop at Target you will get register coupons as well.
-Earth's Best Organic baby tooth paste. It's all natural and comes with a finger brush. Calvin was unsure of it at first, but he now opens his mouth for me and loves to have his teeth brushed!
-Cheerios. Perfect finger food, and they're healthy.
-Aveeno Diaper Rash cream. Calvin developed a diaper rash for the first time, and I literally tried every cream there is. Aveeno is the best and cleared it up right away. It's also all natural and a little goes a long way.
-The "Wonder Weeks" Book or App for iPhone or iPod. It's so on target for where your child is developmentally and explains why they may all of a sudden be fussy or not be sleeping well. I have the app on my phone, and it's a great, accurate resource.




Instinct

As Calvin gets closer to being one year old, I've been reflecting on the fact that my title of "First Time Mom" is almost worn out. Now that we've made it this far, I'm pretty confident in my Mothering. What some people don't know, is that I've helped to raise my three nephews (legally they're my brothers) and I knew about diapers, feedings, and the basics of child rearing prior to giving birth myself. Having your own child is a whole different ball game, though, and with trial and error (and a lot of sleepless nights) I feel like I've come into my own as a Mother. I was thinking about all the "advice" you get from other Moms, friends, family, doctors, nurses, and while most of the advice is coming from a good place, it may or may not apply to your situation. Every child is unique and different so they are just telling you what worked for them, not what will work for your baby. Around the 3 or 4 month mark I stopped reading the books. I stopped frantically Googling everything. It finally hit me that every time I followed my instincts regarding my child, I was right. Every time. Every time I prayed and waited for the right answer, it worked out. Every time. And since the title of my blog includes the word confession.. here are some examples. I developed mastitis on Christmas Day when Calvin was two months old. Mastitis is a breast infection resulting from a clogged duct. It usually happens when your baby starts sleeping in longer stretches, and your body is shocked because the milk is not released as often. It causes flu like symptoms and high fever, not to mention breast pain. I called my on call OB (not my regular midwife) and he told me to stop breastfeeding. WELL. This didn't sound right to me. Stop? Why? So that it can get more clogged? I did my research online through some trusted websites, and everything I read confirmed my instincts. I took the prescribed antibiotic, tylenol for the fever, and within a couple days I was fine. Oh, and I was still breastfeeding. I actually nursed more often. When I consulted with my midwife, she told me I did the right thing. See? Mother's Instinct. It's powerful.
Another example is the "Cry it out" method. This one just won't go away! Even at Calvin's 9 month check up, the nurse said "Oh, you just have to let him scream for a few nights" Why? This makes no sense to me, never has, never will. Don't get me wrong, I don't run to Calvin at his every whimper. Barely! He will fuss in his swing, cry in his crib, carseat, etc.. but this idea of leaving him alone to scream for hours on end blows my mind. This obsession that society has for babies sleeping all night amazes me. Babies don't sleep "all night" for quite a while. Calvin began sleeping in longer stretches between 6-8 weeks. Sleep patterns change and evolve as your baby goes through different developmental stages. Unless you're one of those few people who have babies that like to sleep. (I have yet to meet one) The sleep issue keeps popping up in my parenting. The most common advice besides cry it out was:  "Oh, just put cereal in his bottle and he'll sleep all night". If I had a dollar for every time I heard this, I could literally own a private island. Keep in mind, that this was before Calvin was even able to have solids. We didn't use bottles unless I was at work (Calvin is exclusively breastfed) but I was curious... and tired. I did research for both sides, and I do respectfully realize that many parents including my good friends utilize this advice. I found many articles which state that babies given any kind of solid food prior to the usual 6 month mark are at a higher risk for obesity, allergies and celiac disease, which is an intolerance to gluten. You know all those annoying kids at school who can't have cupcakes? Yea, that's them. So you might get an hour extra here or there because their stomachs are so full (think after Thanksgiving dinner induced coma) BUT later in life, you'll have a lot of stuffy noses on your hands and special requests at the Applebees.
Back to the cry it out method. I am completely guilty of putting Calvin in his crib and walking away to breathe. There are nights as a parent where you want to pull your hair out, and you need to save your sanity. I get it. But every time he has a hard time sleeping alone and I put him in bed with me...we sleep all night. The anti co-sleeper crowd just gasped and maybe even fainted. Every time Calvin has slept with us, there are no tears, and we all sleep. The idea that he'll sleep in bed with us forever if I do that is ludicrous. That's like saying if you keep putting diapers on your infant, they'll never be potty trained. Babies grow up, they get to a stage where they want independence. Calvin will sleep on his own-when he is ready and with our help. Some nights he does fine in his crib. Some nights he doesn't. I've learned to stop forcing it and go with the flow. I love Dr. Sears and his tips for safe, healthy sleeping. (www.askdrsears.com) It's peaceful, safe, and everyone is happy. Again, my instincts told me this from the start and I should have just listened.
Don't get me wrong, I have several friends who have sleep trained, given cereal, etc. They're great Moms who love their kids. This blog is about me and my instinct...once again this is about what is best for Calvin. My husband gave me excellent advice one night as I was sitting by the computer, reading an article aloud and borderline crying. "Babe, who is that article about? It's not about Calvin. Turn the computer off."
You have to listen to your instinct, PRAY, and do what you feel is best. Of course, educate yourself, research, ask questions, but at the end of the day you must trust that as a Mother you will do what is best. Some people do not have this instinct, and that's why there are good pediatricians out there and good websites to help. I have made a myriad of mistakes as a Mother, and I'm sure there are many more where that came from. I've learned from them, and grown. I am so blessed to be the Mom of almost one year old Calvin. I can't wait to see what the future holds, and I'm sure I'll have a million more questions for the next year...BUT I know now that I can do this. I know when to ask for help, and I'm not above that by any means. Mothering is a constant state of asking for help. I'm so appreciative of good friends and family who help me make the right decision, but I'm even more grateful that I have come to know how important it is to listen to my instincts as a Mother.

Fall? Is that you?

School has started, the air is getting a little cooler...and I could not be more excited for fall to arrive. Pumpkins, lattes, leaves falling, all of these things bring a smile to my face! Calvin was born on Halloween, and it is so fitting that he was born during my favorite season! His first birthday is approaching much too quickly for my taste, so here is an update on what our little guy is up to:
-Calvin can clap!! Well, as my nephew Jimmy points out "he's not clapping right"...it's more of just hitting his hands together, but he's getting it! It's so cute, and I love singing "Clap, clap your hands!" and watching him clap and laugh.
-He can wave! He waves Hi, and Bye Bye.
-Giving kisses. This is my favorite. He gives sweet, wet, sloppy kisses!
-Standing up and "walking" while holding on. Calvin has been able to stand for a couple months now, but he is so much better at it and can even stand up while only holding on to something with one hand!
-"Talking" Calvin now makes noises specifically when he wants to show us something and "talks" to himself about his toys or while riding in the car. You can tell by his face that this is different than normal baby noises. He is really trying to communicate with us, and it is very evident that Calvin is going to be quite verbal. He says "kitty cat" "Mama" and "Dada". Kitty cat is my favorite because he whispers it and says it so funny! It sounds more like "Kickat" haha.
-Reading books. Calvin LOVES to look at books, and it's the only time he sits still. I took him to Barnes and Noble with the boys and he adored the trains!! He loved playing with the train set and picking out books. I can't wait to do more fun activities with him as he gets older.

We love our growing boy! At his 9 month check up he weighed 22.08 pounds and was 28 inches long. His hair is filling out, and he has 6 teeth! He is eating baby food regularly and loves several different kinds. He is a pistol, though...when he doesn't want something, he lets you know! Calvin is always on the move, crawling everywhere, into everything, and loves to play. I can't believe he'll be one in just a couple months. That will be an emotional day for sure! It has truly flown by, and I could not be more grateful to be his Mommy.

Breastfeeding Q&A

It's amazing to me how many questions, comments, and advice I receive about feeding my child. It is totally fine with me for friends or family to ask questions when it's coming from a good place. As a matter of fact, I enjoy discussing it and offering help to others. I truly believe it takes a village to raise a child, and I am open to advice and offering my own as well. I have no problem with that, but there are individuals who approach me randomly on a regular basis (mostly at work) who like to make comments or ask questions and it often makes me feel uncomfortable. Instead of saying how I really feel to the ones who I've encountered, I will list some of the most common questions and comments I get from people and address them here as a sort of self induced therapy exercise. Enjoy!

1. "Breastfeeding is gross"
This statement can only come from immaturity and lack of education. All I can do is list the reasons why breastfeeding is NOT gross:
-It's natural and I hate to break it to you, but it's the reason why women were made the way they are.
-It's normal!
-Last time I checked, saving money is NOT gross.
-Baby's poop doesn't smell that bad (it still smells, I mean it is poop!), they spit up very little, and have less gas.

2. "Doesn't it hurt?!"
-Nothing can hurt more than what you just did...which was give birth.
-Yes, it hurts at first, but only in the beginning. After a little while, it doesn't hurt at all!
-All good things in life are hard! It's not easy and it's a commitment. Raising a child is hard, so it all goes hand in hand.
-My amazing friend Jill puts it perfectly "Short term sacrifice for long term gain" The benefits outweigh the costs by a long shot.

3. "I want to have a life!"-UM then don't have a baby. It doesn't matter how you feed your child, your life will change forever once you give birth.
-I have a life, and it's a great one! It just happens to be prioritized differently than before I had a child.

4. "Why are you pumping?"-It's what's best for my baby, and I want to maintain our bond while working.

5. "What if your baby is allergic to milk, you don't have enough supply, or can't keep up?" -All valid questions. Here's an easy fix to the milk allergy: don't drink milk. Calvin was spitting up excessively, acting uncomfortable and for several weeks we couldn't pinpoint the problem. It turns out he's lactose intolerant. I eliminated milk and heavy dairy products from my diet and he was like a new baby! Most babies cannot tolerate dairy products, and many formula fed infants have to be on soy formula.
-Supply is a constant worry of nursing moms. Basically the more you nurse or pump, the more you produce. Lactation consultants are very beneficial for moms with supply issues. Breastfed babies do not need as much in a bottle as formula fed babies do.  A big reason for supply issues later on is hospitals and nurses pushing supplementation at birth. It's totally unnecessary and not recommended if you want to breastfeed. A great website to help with supply issues or questions is www.kellymom.com. Of course, some women have lasting issues that cannot be remedied. Totally understandable and kudos for making the effort! There are ways to obtain breastmilk if you cannot produce it yourself. Wet nurses and milk sharing were customary and normal before formula came around. It should still be normal, and in my eyes it is.

6. "Talking about, seeing or being around breastfeeding makes me uncomfortable"-We are living in a world where even PG movies have nudity, you can't be on a highway for 10 minutes without seeing billboards for stipclubs, and breastfeeding makes people uncomfortable? When my Dad was growing up, women would openly feed their babies at the store or at the bus stop. It was normal and totally fine. I'm not the type to feed my baby in the middle of the mall, but it shouldn't be a problem if I chose to do so.

7. "Your baby's big, how long are you going to breastfeed?"-The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding for at least the first year of life. The health benefits are outstanding for both baby and Mom
-How long a woman nurses is only her choice. No one should be made to feel bad regarding length of time no matter what their choice! A recent study stated that if every woman breastfed for at least 6 months-1 year, the US would save 13 billion in health care costs. (Yes, billion.)
-My new response when asked how long I will nurse is "I think until kindergarten, is that too long?" LOL.  
-The average age of weaning worldwide is 4. Why is it weird to nurse an older infant in the US?

8. "But your baby has teeth!"-Again, this is a vaild question but I am giving people a little project when they say this to me with horror on their face: Drink a bottle of water and see if you use your teeth. ;)


A day in the life of a pumping, working Mom:
Me @ Work, in the designated "Lactation Room". Federal Law mandates that employers provide Moms with a private, quiet place to pump that is NOT a bathroom. You are allowed to have breaks to pump and a fridge should be provided to store the milk.

Milk I've built up in the freezer. Frozen milk lasts for 4 months in a regular freezer (it's much longer in a deep freezer), 8 days in the fridge, and 8 hours room temperature.

My Pump. It's a plain, black back so it's not very bulky or noticeable. The best kind to buy are electric, double pumps. They are expensive, so save coupons or giftcards! The more expensive the pump, the longer it lasts and the better you produce. It's a one time investment, which is great.

Motherhood & Friendship.

After I got married, I was of course blissful and so grateful to have found an amazing husband to share my life with. After the honeymoon wore off; however I noticed something lacking...friendship, or at least the regular connections with friends. I've maintained some GREAT friendships and even gained some excellent new ones, but as I've entered into motherhood I've found the outings with friends are few and far between. Things have to be so planned out, so arranged...I miss the days of high school when your best friends just went everywhere with you...to the bathroom, to the mall, to bed, to school, whatever, wherever, whenever! It didn't matter, and it was like there was no shortage of female comraderie. I blame social media for a lot of this change, but I think much of it has to do with America and our preconceived notions that we have to have everything clean before someone comes over, everything checked off our to-do list, and have make up on with a smile to match. I often wonder if it were not for Facebook, how many of us would make the effort to talk to our friends, see their babies, and enjoy quality time? This makes me sad, and I know that I am to blame as well. My days are filled with work, taking care of my family, church, taking care of Calvin, and trying to get some sleep in there somewhere if possible. There is little time for leisure for myself, let alone going out with girlfriends. But like I said before, why do things have to be so specifically planned? I'm going to make a concerted effort to change this in my life. I read a blog post yesterday that literally brought tears to my eyes. It referenced what one Mom experienced during her time in Kenya when she noticed that none of the women ever felt lonely:

"They spend their days singing and dancing together, washing clothes together, watching their children together, standing in line for water together. They live in tight-knit communities that never allow each other to fall down. If a woman can’t feed her children, then the woman next door puts food for everyone on the table. They never face a Friday night on Facebook, looking up old boyfriends and reading about parties that they weren’t invited to. They always have a friend right by their side"


So here's to the sleepovers where you laughed so hard someone peed their pants, the nights you stayed up as late as possible just to say you did, and the times you cried together and it felt like you were literally holding each other up. I'm on my way to get some of that back, and STILL be a great wife and Mommy.

Just keep swimming

The past few weeks have been crazy busy! Work has stretched me paper thin, and has caused quite a bit of stress. Elio has been pulling double shifts, has had crazy schedule changes, and multiple midnights. This causes exhaustion for me when Calvin is up all night with his fifth tooth coming through, and  I don't have Daddy to help out! His presence is truly missed when he's not here, and I greatly appreciate all he does for our family-both at work & at home. The mantra that keeps playing in my head is "Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming!" from Finding Nemo. Unlike Nemo, who is a cute clown fish with a gimp fin that is eventually reunited with his Father...I am an overworked and underpaid social worker who is beyond burned out. I know that there is a light at the end of this tunnel, and I am praying that God provides us with an answer soon as to how I can make a major change for our family.


We snuck away the past couple of days to Elio's parents' lake house in Monticello, IN. It's right on the river leading to Lake Shafer, and we took the boys (our nephews) along as well. It was a GREAT getaway. We got to go boating, tubing, sleep in (until 8am! haha), cookout, go to Indiana Beach, and just relax. I am so grateful that all of us were able to enjoy the weekend and forget about work! The boys had a blast, and I love watching them have fun. Since we have had Calvin, I have not been able to take them on as many fun adventures such as movie nights, bowling, or beach days. This was a much overdue fun weekend for us all.


Although work has had us both stressed out, I know that God has not brought us this far to leave us. Our bills are paid, we have a cozy home, healthy family, and a beautiful baby! My Dad has been doing well lately and we could not be more grateful for that.
So, I'll just keep swimming...


Here are some photos of our crazy, hilarious 9 month old as well as some from our weekend:

Dog Days

The "dog days" of summer are upon us. This past week has graced us with temperatures reaching into the early 100's. I read once that small minds discuss the weather so as to avoid real conversation so I'll sum up my feelings on this stage of summer: I hate it!

Last weekend we traveled to Kentucky for Elio's family reunion. It was his Mom's side of the family. Except for a weekend trip to Wisconsin Dells when Calvin was 5 months old, this was our first family road trip. Let's just say that Calvin did as well as we could expect from a sweaty, energetic 8 month old! He did not like the car ride, did not like sleeping somewhere other than home, did not want to nap, and would not eat baby food. He did; however charm all of the family and put on a good face for all the activities! We ended up having a good time and made lasting memories. Elio was especially thrilled to reconnect with his cousins. I am grateful that God kept us safe and sound through it all! It was a great break from work and the daily routine. Calvin was especially grateful, though, to return to his daily routine. ;)

Calvin has turned into a full fledged BOY. He has a hilarious personality and is doing so many funny things. He loves to play games with us, and his sense of humor is amazing. He now has FOUR teeth! Two on top and two on bottom. His smile is just to die for. He keeps us on our toes and chasing him takes up the majority of our time. I love nursing him and the bond that it has fostered between us. Elio has been so proud of us and so encouraging!

I've felt the "Mama" blues lately. You know, the kind where you feel like all you do is clean, feed the baby, change diapers, do laundry, make dinners, go to work, and then start it all over again the next day. Work has been especially taxing as of late. I've prayed for God to open a new door for me for quite some time now. Apparently His answer is to "Wait". That's quite possibly my least favorite answer, ever...but I will do just that. Wait. I've applied for other positions and I've also felt a calling to  possibly move in a different direction altogether. Since Calvin's birth, and even prior, I've always been inspired by Mothers, Birth, Breastfeeding, and Childcare. I've always either taken care of children or worked with children. I'm feeling called into a different direction other than social work, and I'm praying for direction, guidance, and wisdom to know exactly where to go and how to do it! I'm also hoping for more opportunities to reconnect with friends and just have some fun.

Time to go watch TV with my husband. It's the little things that make us happy! :)

Summer Daze!

I cannot believe it's July! The past couple of months have been a blur of activity and our weekends have been pretty hectic.
Calvin is hilarious! He is now 8 months, and has had so many "firsts" in the past few weeks. He has a tooth! This has not been a fun experience for any of us...screaming, fevers, etc. Teething is NOT fun! We have pushed through it and I am just glad that our boy has his first real tooth! Many more appear to be on their way as well. Yippee! ;)
He can crawl like a big boy using all fours, and it appears that this was only accomplished so that he could crawl to an object and promptly STAND up! He stands in his crib, holding onto chairs or the couch, in his play yard, pretty much anywhere he can get a good grip. This, of course, comes with tumbles and falls which I hate! I know it's all a part of him learning and growing, and he is getting better about knowing to be careful. He is also imitating sounds and facial expressions, like whistling! It's amazing to see him learning so many new things! Calvin is developing by leaps and bounds, and he has sailed through all the "milestones" he needs to achieve thus far...and then some. I am so proud to be his Mama. He sure keeps us all on our toes! He loves to spit, yell, laugh, and play games with us. The boys sure love it when he spits at them! haha.

Summer has sure kept our family busy so far. Projects inside and outside, soccer games, and family outings take up most of our time (besides work, of course). It has been a rainy summer with alot of thunderstorms, so that has been quite the adventure. Running into the house with a 20 pound baby in an equally heavy carseat through torrential rain...or applying huge amounts of sunscreen on a very busy, sweaty baby...hmmm...I think I'll be glad when it's time for fall!  

Baby on the Go

I am now the parent of a 7 month old, active, hilarious, big baby boy! Over the past few weeks Calvin has grown so much and can do so many new things! He is now crawling, but not with all fours quite yet. He uses all his upper body strength to pull himself wherever his little heart desires...which is usually to something he's not supposed to have! He is SO busy and hard to keep up with! It makes me happy though, because it shows me how unbelievably smart he is. He sure keeps us all on our toes. Changing his diaper and getting dressed has turned into a wrestling match. We cannot get over how strong he is!
Calvin is eating so well, and that makes me so glad. Pumping at work is going great, thank God. People often say "I don't know how you do it", etc. but honestly if you want something badly enough, you just do it. I make the time, make the effort, and we're all happier and healthier because of it! It surprises me though when I get judgement from other women or people saying rude or ignorant comments. I have not judged any of my friends for their feeding choices, and as a woman and now a Mom I don't feel it's right. Having an opinion is one thing, but making me feel uncomfortable or being rude is a whole other problem. As Moms, we have to do what is best for our babies and families, and I feel like we should be nothing but supportive to one another.
Calvin is totally ready for solids, he tries to grab whatever we're eating, is so interested in food, and LOVES trying new things! He likes spinach, broccoli, pears, mangos, rutabaga, carrots, and a few others. It's so fun and I love having him join us for family dinners. I hope he stays open minded about food, and I intend to work on that. The whole "kiddie menu" thing is kind of a turn off for me. I want Calvin to experiment with food and love the experience as much as our family does! I was picky growing up, so I hope that he stays this open to new things. I love cooking and I can't wait to include Calvin in baking and cooking.
His personality is so sweet. He is starting to get stranger anxiety and always looks for Mom or Dad to make sure we're close by. He's sweet and happy to everyone, and he's a huge hit at church.
Some of the "firsts" in Calvin's life lately are pulling himself up to a standing position, sitting up on his own with no support, picking things up with his finger and thumb, "army crawling" everywhere, splashing in the tub, feeding himself with the bottle at the babysitter's house, and smiling with his gums together like a big boy!
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Our family has been through a lot the past few months, and I can't help but wonder why at times. I have to say that God is so good and provides us with exactly what we need, and when we need it! We lost one of our best, loved family pets on Friday. My Dad is still heartbroken, and it was hard on all of us. I'm grateful that she is no longer suffering but it makes us all think about why we even bother getting so attached to pets or even people. A quote that means alot to me and really describes this well is:

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”

C.S. Lewis

First Mother's Day!

Today was such a great day! I was able to sleep in late, had a great time at church, got some fabulous gifts, and spent a wonderful afternoon with my family. This Mother's Day was truly special!
I owe so much of my joy to my husband. I'm so blessed to have a man who takes the time to make sure that I know that my hard work does not go unnoticed.

Calvin is growing by leaps and bounds! He is well over six months and is trying so hard to crawl. He can do a full push up and launches himself forward to get whatever he has his eye on. He's very stubborn and makes it perfectly clear what he wants! Adventures with solid food are so fun as well. We take it slow and just experiment with different flavors to see what he likes and to expose him to different fruits and veggies. It's not a part of his daily routine and it won't be until he's older. So far, he loves mangoes! He also likes avocado. We tried some organic baby oatmeal mixed with mangoes and he loved that. It's such a fun experience for all of us to see his face as we try new things. I would like to make all his food, but the reality is that I won't always have the time so I've been exploring which products I like. Some brands that I've found are Ella's, Happy Baby, Earth's Best, and Plum. All are affordable and completely natural and preservative/pesticide free. Happy Baby, Ella's and Plum are in convenient pouches, it's great! I love our chunky, cute baby. I had to clean out all his drawers and closet and replace them with 6-9 months clothing. Even so, trying to get some things over his head is a challenge. ;) I tell him that just means he's smart...

I'm so blessed and grateful to have a healthy, happy baby boy. God is so good, and our family has learned so many lessons over the past few months! We recently sold one of our vehicles to down size and save money, and I am so grateful it worked out. I'm learning more and more about how what you think may be the worst thing that could happen to you can turn into a blessing in some form or another. Since my Dad is no longer able or wants to use his Jeep, Elio can use it for his work car. We are able to save a significant amount of money and begin to get to a point where we've wanted to be.

Mother's Day has also brought much reflection on how my life has changed! Not only with having a child, but with marriage and some of the trials we've been through, I've definitely come a long way. This time a couple years ago, I was driving a red sports car that I thought I'd always wanted. Now I'm happy to have my "normal" sedan that saves on gas and is safe for Calvin. I used to drop an embarassing amount of money on clothes and shoes, then Elio got laid off for over a year and I learned what's really important is having a fridge full of food. I'm so grateful for how far we've come and celebrating this day together was the perfect reminder of that.

Spring has Sprung...

I love that spring is in the air! It's exciting to think about all the things we will be able to do with Calvin when the weather warms up. I've been thinking a lot lately about myself as a Mom...
I always knew I wanted to be a Mom. I vividly remember a conversation I had with my best friend while I was in college, studying my life away...I told her that the only vocation I feel like I was BORN to do was to be a Mom. I've always taken care of kids. I've helped to raise my three nephews as if they are my own. The oldest, Brandon, was born when I was 12 and I loved giving him bottles, changing his diaper and dressing him. We have a very special bond that I wouldn't change for the world. I've babysat others' kids for money while I was a teenager, nannied in college, and no matter what was going on with my college schedule or work schedule, I always was there for my nephews' games, school programs or just to take care of them. For me it's not hard, its just what you do. Family is everything! God has blessed me with a great family, and no matter how stressful or how "hard" it may get, it's all worth it!
Before Calvin was born, I was very "by the book". I researched everything, read online constantly, and even after he was born I found myself sucked into what you are supposed to do. I've found that now, today, in this moment I am more myself than I ever was or hoped to be. I do what I feel is best for Calvin, I pray for him, and I pray for guidance. Of course I read and ask the Doctor or other Moms for opinions or advice. At the end of the day, though, it's about what I feel is best for him. If Calvin is healthy and happy, then so am I!
I feel like the new question of the day is "how long are you going to breastfeed?" Why is there a time frame on it? Breastfeeding is so beautiful and natural, and we finally have such a good rhythm, why would I want to change that? I actually read a blog online the other day that said it is impossible to work full time and exclusively breastfeed. WELL...nothing is impossible with God and a little hard work, thank you very much. Motherhood has taught me more than ever that if you want something badly enough, or you feel strongly enough about something, you just DO IT. Regardless of others'  judgement, opinions, or negativity, you have to do what is best for your baby and your family.
I don't know when this happened, or quite how, but I have realized that in all arenas of my life, I am ME. With my friends, at work, at home, wherever...I feel as if I have come into my own as a woman, wife, and Mother. It's a great feeling, and I feel like I am being the person that God created me to be. Of course, I have inumerable flaws, shortcomings, and moments of insanity but who doesn't? I've learned to embrace the "different" things about myself, and sometimes you just have to laugh!
Also-why should I have to choose between my education and career and motherhood? It shouldn't be an either/or scenario. I feel like so many people label mothers as either a working mom, or a stay at home mom. Aren't we all doing the same job?? Doing the best we can for our families? Although I would love to be able to stay at home with Calvin, my career is a worthwhile one that helps support my family. At work, I do make a difference in the lives of others. If I stayed home, I would still try to do that. I hope to begin my Master's program this fall, and I want to always push myself to go further, to work harder, and to show Calvin that mediocre is never good enough. Even if its just reading books at home, learning new things, or trying new foods, you must always push yourself to be the best you can possibly be!

CALVIN UPDATE:
Our little baby boy is no longer a little baby! In March, he was 15 pounds and on Sunday he will be 6 months old! He is getting so big and learning so many new things. He loves his bouncer chair, and yesterday Mommy and Calvin took a bath together for the first time. He loved the bubbles and playing with his toys. Calvin is trying to crawl and can almost sit up on his own! He tried some pureed bananas and really liked them. We're taking it slow with solids. I see no reason to force him, and babies don't need anything else until they're older. I'm taking it a little bit at a time, and letting him go at his own pace.
Calvin sleeps so well now and has settled into a routine. He is alot like his Mom...if his routine is thrown off he is a maniac. ;)